Tuesday, September 9, 2014

What you think I sold 'em all?

"Lets go murder Murder, Brother."

The Second Annual Twin Linked Grand Tournament is nearly upon us.

The Twin Linked Tournament Series is simply the funnest, most hardcore, most well run tournament(s) we have attended, Ever. Its got basically all the things we love the most - intense Murder on the tabletops, and seriously brutal 40k competition. Its organized, easy going, and run at the highest level of professionalism possible.

This is how I remember my first Twin Linked Event:

All the players hanging out in the main room, checking out each others armies, teams, and possible match ups. The Wolfbrothers stalking through the crowd talking smack, their shiny halos bestowed personally by the Emperor of Mankind himself - glorious in all ways. 

Suddenly Mark enters the room. The crowd is immediately silenced by his presence and he pauses significantly to look us over, reaching into each man's soul though our eyes. He ripped off his shirt and flexed, then jumped explosively and kicked out the highest lightbulb in the room, landing gracefully and ready to kill. All but The Wolfbrothers seemed intimidated. Then he spoke in a booming, beautiful voice:

See here all of you filth - I am in charge of this motherfucker, you will all do as I say, and if any of you complain in any manner you will be instantly killed without mercy. You there  - (he motioned to one of the Jirus) - is this your warlord? - Without any hesitation for a response he snatched up the custom scratch built model with custom sculpted base and then immediately smashed it into a billion pieces on the concrete floor. - That is not your Warlord anymore! Your warlord and everyone else's warlord has just died a horrible, humiliating death and is immediately removed from the tournament! Bess was shocked and appalled and responded, "Hod.." - before he could finish his sophisticated speech, he was decapitated by a swift and unseeable kick from Mark. - Anyone else have any  questions? Now get to the Murder you slime, get to the fucking Murder."

It was amazing in all ways. We cant wait for this years Final Event, the Grand Tournament. The chance to defend Our Titles in fantastic MURDER and GLORY on the tabletops.

Last year we had the greatest fun stomping face on... everyone. We know this time around the tabletop war will be exponentially more intense, and that you are out for our destruction in a worse way than ever before.

Just how we want you - worked up, intense, Brutal and Murderous - Serious in your quest for our defeat. We want you to fight your best and meanest and to defeat us through awesome hardwork and skill. We want to be bested by the ultimate opponent. We want that GLORY. We breath it like air! We will fight you with the very best and everything we have. We are always eager and ready for the truth of battle! The Wolfbrothers are on the Hunt, and You Are Next.

So wheres all the Madd Rappers at?